Random thoughts...
I was thinking the other day of how much my life has seemed like a movie lately, when a disturbing thought occurred to me. In the movie of my life I wouldn't be played by George Clooney or some other star, it would definitely be Ralph Maccio of "Karate Kid" fame. Sad, but true.
I have never understood why it is a pair of underwear, you wear just one at a time. Unless I've been doing it wrong all along.
There may be more than one way to skin a cat, but is it really worth the effort?
If you are a male age 25 or older, and you aren't able to quote large portions of "The Godfather" I think you have some issues and are probably untrustworthy.
You know those Germans, they're not all sunshine and lollipops.
In Christian Scientology all reality is made by agreement. I think we can all agree that L. Ron Hubbard is Tony Robbins masquerading as Benny Hinn.
Monkeys sell. I will probably buy any product endorsed by a chimp.
I don't know who invented Cool Whip, but I would kiss that person full on the lips, irregardless of gender.
Irregardless is not a real word. It annoys me to no end when someone says irregardless.
Penguins make me laugh, giraffes make me smile, roaches make me shudder, koalas make me sad, and I am really suspicious of armadillos.
I love the word exquisite. I just don't get to use it very often. "That Cool-whip ad with the monkey was just exquisite."
Sooner or later, there won't be a sooner or later.
"The little bastard shot me in the ass!" best movie line ever.
Suffering is inevitable, misery is a choice.
I really don't like needles, I would be such an underachiever as a heroin addict. I would always be procrastinating getting high.
If there is a house band in hell, it will be Chicago. Nothing is more evil than Peter Cetera's voice. Hounds of hell rejoice in the hearing.
I am so glad that I live in the time after someone came up with the idea of toilet paper.
Has anyone ever thought that clowns were cute and funny? Deeply disturbing is my definitition.
Sean Penn is a great actor, and Bono is a terrific frontman, but has anyone ever taken themselves more seriously?
You spin me right round baby, right round, like a record baby. round, round, round, round.
That's it you don't have to go home, but you can't stay here.
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